Finally under way

It isn't the World Cup yet, it isn't the World Cup yet, and then suddenly and joyously it is, and there's corners and free kicks and everything. I opened a fresh bottle of scotch for it, I wonder if you'll be able to tell?

They gave Mexico the opening game. The US get the final, and Canada get to shut up and be grateful. They do get the second host game tomorrow, and the US get theirs in the bit of tomorrow that we call Saturday morning. This is the downside of having multiple hosts. We normally only have to get through one opening ceremony, but this time we have three and one of them will have Donald Trump in it. It's alright for you, you'll be asleep. I have to write about it.

If you get the first game you also get the first opening ceremony. This gave Mexico their chance to shine, and they gave us most of the required elements. Big words about diversity: check. Aztec imagery: check. Remembering not to refer to the human sacrifice: check. Band that sound like the Police but in Spanish: they were all over it. National costumes, massive phallic trophy, rap/bhangra crossover segueing into a mariachi Teletubbies? They couldn't have managed without any of these, they clearly felt.

They missed a few tricks. There wasn't an animatronic Zorro for some reason, and I didn't spot any references to Mexico's splendid range of entertaining desert plants. I was also a little taken aback by the floral wreath saying 'We Are Ready'. It really hadn't occurred to me that they might not be. Come on guys, you've known about this for eight years now. We should just be able to assume you're ready.

They weren't making an opening ceremony for me though, and I bet all the pop stars were famous. Plus the Azteca Stadium is made of volcanic rock, so well done for that. I'm fond of Ashton Gate, but it isn't made of volcanic rock as far as I'm aware.

After the ceremony we cut back to the ITV studio, which is a delight in itself. They've given them a massive open air site looking over the Brooklyn bridge, with the East River and that classic skyline behind it. It's enough to make Roy Keane crack a smile, you might have thought. They've even managed to solve the sound problems that have bedevilled open air sites in previous tournaments.

Half an hour later we were back for the second opening ceremony, coming this time from - um - from Mexico again. If Canada and the USA both decide they want two goes each as well then I don't know how we're going to squeeze in all that plus 104 football matches.

This one was simpler, though. They brought out 48 flags in turn and they all got polite applause except the US, then we had one more quick pop song. More than Just a Game, it seemed to be called, I couldn't quite make out the next line but my best guess is it was 'it's also a marketing opportunity'. Finally, like a cool stream after a horticultural hike across the Mojave, out came the two teams.

The South African anthem is weird. I'm sure they could do away with the apartheid bit by now, the first half is better than most anthems on its own. What are the racists going to do, bring back apartheid? The Mexican one is flat out disappointing, not that the seventy three million Mexicans crammed into the Azteca seemed to mind.

Almost as an afterthought a football match broke out, and nine minutes in Mexico scored. Once they were on to the business at hand they really didn't need to tell anyone they were ready, it was the South Africans that looked unprepared. There have been questions about their squad selection, in particular about whether players from the domestic league have been prioritised over the ones that took the Yankee dollar or the European Euro. It's a bit early to be making judgements on that point, but the first signs weren't encouraging.

They huffed and they puffed, to be fair, but Mexico always looked in charge, and just past the hour Raoul Jimenez got his head on a cross for their second. He's a funny one Jimenez, he went from Wolves to Fulham but now he's chosen to go back to Wolves again after they've been relegated. He'll be coming to Ashton Gate with them at some point next season, and I hope the anti-climax of it doesn't get him down. Maybe we can get some pumice stone cladding up so he feels at home.

It was strange, a two goal lead can always be overturned but you never felt like South Africa might. They had two players sent off, but weren't much even before. The final whistle must have felt like a mercy killing.

The other group game was a much closer contest. South Korea beat the Czech Republic 2-1 in Guadalajara (we seem to be doing old country names, we have Turkey, the Czech Republic, the Ivory Coast and Cape Verde). After a poor first half the game really picked up, which left some of us wondering if the temperatures were a factor. More on that as the tournament progresses, I expect.

Mexico will face tougher challenges against both countries, and could still quite easily go out. South Africa's toughest challenge will come when they try to explain their shitness after they get home.